Please… stop writing about how “vulnerable” you are

Please god, let me never run across one of these quotes again:

You know what else is terrifying? My face as I read yet another one of these sugary-sweet quotes that so many people post about vulnerability.

Is anyone else sick of this shit?

It seems like everyone around us is telling us to be more vulnerable. Share your failures! Be more open! There’s power in being authentic when you share your shame!

But they don’t tell you the full story. Vulnerability can get you a bunch of likes, or it can even get you a TED Talk…

…but you’ll notice these “experts” deliberately leave out one key part of vulnerability.

Nobody ever talks about it.

But I will.

***

In my 20s I prided myself on being an “unemotional” guy.

Take a look. This is the impression I left on the person who interviewed me for a Fortune Magazine profile:

And it goes back way further than that.

For example, growing up in a middle-class family, I knew I’d have to get scholarships to pay for college. I applied to 65+ and got interviews with a bunch. I thought I did great, but I kept losing to other candidates. Why?

It turns out that when you walk into a room, and they ask, “How are you?” and you respond with a TOTALLY FLAT SERIAL-KILLER AFFECT — “I am doing great” or “I am so excited to be here” — people don’t really like that.

Part of it was being raised as an Indian guy. Indian and Asian guys aren’t raised to show our emotions like other people. It took me years and a lot of hard work to understand this, then work to show my feelings. That practice helped me earn enough scholarship money to pay for college, it helped me get closer to people I love, and frankly, it’s been a lot more FUN.

So trust me when I say this: I know how valuable it can be to show your emotional side every once in awhile. I learned it the hard way.

But when did it become not just acceptable — but COOL — to talk about our most crippling vulnerabilities?

Have you noticed how more and more people on social media and in articles are talking about the importance of vulnerability…and less about excellence? Why is this happening?

Please, can we stop it with every single random blogger, author, and rando on Facebook sharing some random mistake they made in life?

If you ask them, do you notice how people think being vulnerable makes them “courageous”?

• Having trouble in your relationships? Find the “courage” to be vulnerable and everything will be ok.
• Hard time at work? Be strong and open up to your boss about how you’re feeling.
• Kids stressing you out? Sit them down and share with them why you’re having a difficult time.

But today I want to give you a totally new way to look at vulnerability and show you how good people can get suckered into writing about vulnerability and failure all the time. Because contrary to what you hear on Facebook (and even a lot of TED Talks), vulnerability is NOT always the right answer.

The irresistible temptation of vulnerability

There are 3 topics you can write about that guarantee you will get 100+ comments and likes:

1. Your opinion on parenting
2. How much you spent on your wedding
3. Some failure you experienced

For the last topic — failure — readers go absolutely wild.

Here, let me show you how it works.

Recently I wrote about the insecurities that come with being an entrepreneur.

People LOVED it. There were nearly 150 comments. I started thinking…”Should I write more about this? People sure love my stories about failing.”

This is exactly what most people experience: They write a post about failure, get an unbelievable amount of comments and pats on the back, then decide they want to keep a good thing going.

They suddenly embrace The Failure Formula:

Step 1: Write about a mistake they made

Step 2: Get hundreds of supportive/validating comments (“I definitely needed this today!”)

Step 3: Repeat!

There’s a reason almost every self-development article online talks about the writer’s failures: It works. I have never gotten as many comments as when I write about my own failures (see here and here).

And yet, this is why 99% of those commenters will go nowhere.

It’s true — people love when you write about your mistakes and failures. But there’s a serious downside to doing what gets you the most “likes”.

Sometimes it's OK to stop talking about your insecurities and mental barriers and just do the work. You feel better when you win.

— Ramit Sethi (@ramit) October 25, 2016

When you define yourself by your vulnerability, you leave little room for success. Ironically, the people whose approval you will increasingly crave — and you will crave it more and more — are the very people who want to commiserate over others’ failures. They are the last people anyone should seek approval from.

I’d like to present a new way of thinking about vulnerability. It includes something people rarely talk about: status.

The Vulnerability Matrix

There are some well-documented examples of how vulnerability can help you. Being vulnerable and open can be tremendously rewarding and valuable to you.

But in this day of “radical transparency,” what most people won’t tell you is that vulnerability can also hurt you. Nobody ever talks about these nuances.

I want to break down these nuances for you.

The Vulnerability-Status matrix is a very simple way to see what you’ll gain by being more vulnerable. Surprisingly there’s only one case where that will serve you. Check it out.

First, you have the … Aspirational Leader

This is who we all aspire to be like. High status and high vulnerability. Not only are they insanely successful and great at what they do, almost everyone likes them.

Examples: Billionaire founder of Virgin Airlines Richard Branson, actress Jennifer Lawrence (here’s an amazing video on why she’s so likable), and The Rock.

People in this category make impeccable use of The Pratfall Effect. This is what happens when a high-status person makes a mistake or admits to some kind of flaw. They do this, and instead of losing respect for them — we end up finding them MORE attractive and MORE likable.

The key here is status. If a low-status person made the same mistakes or admitted the same vulnerabilities, it’s not perceived the same way. It’s not “cool” or even status-enhancing. But for a high-status person, vulnerability is a major plus.

Take away the vulnerability and you get … Accomplished & Aloof

Personally, I’m a good example of this bucket (in the bottom-right). Fortunately, I’ve been professionally successful, but I’m not very vulnerable. That rubs a lot of people the wrong way. And I probably miss out on connecting with a lot of my readers or the people who hear me talk.

In fact, I once spoke on stage at the same event as James Altucher. Someone working for me at the time came up to me after.

“Can I give you some feedback?” she asked. I said “Sure.”

“Why is it that James — who’s made and lost tens of millions of dollars — is WAY more relatable than you are?” she asked me.

She was right. If you’ve ever read or listened to James, it’s pretty clear why.

Former NFL linebacker James Harrison is another example of being completely unrelatable thanks to his insane workouts.

And at the extreme end of this bucket are guys like Elon Musk or Larry Page. They are so successful — and they share so little about themselves — that they seem inhuman.

Personally, I’ve made it a point to be more open to the people around me. If you saw my speech at Forefront, or if you’ve seen my article on shutting down a multimillion-dollar product, you’ll see. But I always prioritize excellence over vulnerability.

Next, you have the … Delusional Wannabe

This was me when I was in my 20s. God, I was so dumb. I remember speaking on a panel with author and venture capitalist Guy Kawasaki. Afterwards, I asked him how I could get more speaking gigs.

He looked at me and said, “Worry about doing something worth talking about first.”

Damn. That felt horrible. And it took me a long time to realize he was right. The Delusional Wannabe has low status, but isn’t vulnerable at all.

And finally, the … Loser

Being open about your vulnerabilities is fine. However, using them as the sole crutch to connect with people — to get more comments and likes — is not. That’s when people go from “open” to needy and pathetic.

Worse, it’s just bad strategy!

If you talk about vulnerability over and over on social media — without balancing it out with your positive thoughts on a topic, or your accomplishments, or some other insight — you attract only people who love talking about failure. Sadly, these people are almost always looking to commiserate, not change. And you never even realize what you’re doing to yourself: creating a self-reinforcing vortex of failures that get reinforced every single time you post them.

So what should you do?

Imagine two people. Same level of skill. Same age. Same job.

One of them spends the next year learning to be more vulnerable. Learns how to “open up” emotionally and share his failures with other people.

The other spends the year doing the opposite. He spends his time mastering his craft and improving his communication skills. (Here are the top 3 skills I recommend you master btw.)

This is the difference between (a) the writer who decides he wants to “help people,” contemplates becoming a life coach, and decides he better first begin by starting a blog where he can write about his “life experiences” and emotions for other people to read…

… and (b) the writer who meticulously studies better writers, practices coming up with and pitching ideas, and spends 3 nights per week writing extra drafts to get feedback on the next day.

At the end of the year, who do you think is going to be further ahead? Who is going to be happier with their life?

The person who focuses on excellence — not vulnerability — will live a Rich Life.

He’ll be earning more. He’ll have more respect at work. He’ll have more OPTIONS and CONTROL over his career and his life.

The other guy?

From the outside, it might seem like he did ok. He might have more followers, and plenty of likes. He might very well FEEL pretty good about himself.

But what has he actually done?

Not much.

Now if the first guy, who has accomplished some of his goals, wanted to share some of his toughest moments in growing — being truly vulnerable about mistakes he made and lessons learned — that would be awesome.

But notice that excellence comes first. You can always be vulnerable whenever you want. It’s very, very hard to become excellent. But becoming excellent is where the true rewards are.

I will always focus on people who want to be excellent. If you want to be a top performer, this is the place for you.

What about you? After reading this, you know what “good” vulnerability looks like. In the comments, tell me someone famous who is a master of this and why.

Please… stop writing about how “vulnerable” you are is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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The $20 Emergency Fund

You might think the title of this post is too good to be true, but I promise: this is the easiest hack to building an Emergency Fund on a tight budget. When I decimated my Emergency Fund in 2016 and immediately added to my state of financial crisis with an unplanned pregnancy, I knew I had to get my finances in order fast. But how on earth was I going to rebuild my savings while still trying to build my company and buy baby stuff? Starting is the most important step When I get anxious emails from people trying to get a handle on their finances, usually it’s equal parts overwhelm and failure. I have nothing saved, how can I possibly get to $X? Well, you start by opening an account and putting a dollar in it. If you have $0 saved for retirement, and you wish you had $10,000, […]

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“Help! My mind goes blank when I talk to people”: How to talk to people

Readers will be surprised to hear that I wasn’t always the charming, hilarious, and stylish personal finance expert they know now.

In fact, I was so awkward, I made Urkel look like Robert Downey Jr.

(Not pictured: Someone who isn’t a completely awkward mess.)

I had no idea how to talk to people. I remember I once talked to someone on the phone and spent a solid TWO MINUTES talking. After I finished, the other person just paused for what seemed like forever before saying, “So…what exactly do you want?”

And I had NOTHING to say.

You’ve probably been there before:

• You walk up to a group of friends talking. Stand there awkwardly while waiting for one of them to notice you. Wish for death.
• You start telling a story to a group of people and — in the middle of it — realize the story sucks. Continue anyway.
• You go to an event and instead of meeting people, pull out your phone and furiously check email.

The good news is being able to talk to people and hold an engaging conversation is a SKILL — and like any other skill it can be learned, honed, and mastered.

A while back I got a question from an IWT reader named Emily. She asked:

“How do you approach companies/or anything else when you don’t have any confidence? I seem to go mentally blank. And the words don’t come out at all. Backwards and not in order.”

It’s a fascinating paradox. With your friends, you tend to have the BEST stories but if you just met a group of people, all of a sudden your mind goes blank and you have nothing to say. Most people are willing to say “that’s how it is,” but you can actually be able to treat this with systems.

Today, I want to teach you a system that’ll help you talk to people and NEVER run out of things to say. All you have to do is craft a toolbox.

Crafting your social toolboxes

Before you start to brush up on your carpentry skills, you should know that I’m talking about more figurative toolboxes — but just as useful as their physical counterparts.

They are your:

1. Story Toolbox
2. Question Toolbox

At their core, your two toolboxes are documents wherein you write down all of your interesting stories and questions that you can have “ready-made” to share with friends and strangers at dinners, the bar, or even a job interview.

Once you start filling in your toolbox, you’ll start to realize that you’ll never run out of things again as long as you keep them handy.

How to make a Story Toolbox

I’m a firm believer in the idea that telling a story is the best way to engage someone. It doesn’t matter if you’re with your friends or if you’re trying to sell a product. A good story can make a world of difference when it comes to building a good first impression.

That’s why you always want a large well of great stories to draw on.

You can create your Story Toolbox using any tool you prefer such as:

• Google Docs (what I use)
• Microsoft Word
• Microsoft Excel
• Evernote
• A physical notepad

It doesn’t matter what you record them with as long as you ARE recording them.

These stories could be funny, entertaining, or serious — and you might actually want to organize them as such.

Action step: Create your Story Toolbox

Designate a place to put your stories, and start by adding five of them.

If you can’t think of five good stories, think back to the last time you hung out with your friends or family.

What did you talk about? What made everyone laugh? Every family has an embarrassing/hilarious story. What is it for your family?

Hang out with your friends or family in the next few days, and write down the things you naturally talk about. This will help seed your Story Toolbox for the first time.

How to make a Question Toolbox

If you want to keep the other person you’re talking to engaged, there’s no better way to do it than with a thought-provoking question. It helps you always have something to say and talk to someone you don’t know.

Of course, depending on the context of your conversation, you’re going to want to have different questions for different scenarios.

I remember once, my friend noticed me checking this girl out at a bar, so he goaded me into talking to her. So I approached her and this exchange went down:

Ramit: Hi, I’m Ramit.

Woman: Hi, I’m [whatever].

Ramit: You look like a vodka soda girl. (I know, I know. I don’t know where this horrific line came from.)

Woman: …no.

I was surprised by how she just shut me down, so I decided to have some fun.

Ramit: Aw, c’mon. I’ve been right 100/100 times for the last 5 years. How are you going to break my streak like that?

Woman: I’m a recovering alcoholic.

Shortest. Conversation. EVER. But a funny story now.

If instead, I came in with my question toolbox filled with questions that weren’t awful pick-up lines, I might have had better luck. That’s why you’re going to want to craft different meaty questions for different scenarios.

Action step: Create your Question Toolbox

So the next time you’re making small talk, take note of great questions you hear and ask. Save them in your Question Toolbox for later.

Here are a few good sample questions to get you started:

Networking events/industry conventions

1. What made you decide to do X?
2. What are the biggest challenges when it comes to your industry?
3. If you had to do X again, what would you do differently?
4. As you gained more experience in X, what became more important and why?
5. What would make today/this event successful for you?
6. What still surprises you about X?

Dates

1. What are your biggest goals right now?
2. How do you spend your time?
3. Playful questions like: Which do you like more — pancakes or waffles?
4. What do you hate most about dating? (This question is both interesting and can help you avoid doing the thing they hate.)
5. What’s your favorite restaurant in the city? Why?
6. Which Spotify playlist is the soundtrack to your life?

Baristas/wait staff

1. What’s your favorite thing on the menu? Why?
2. What’s the craziest thing someone tried to order this week?
3. Have you ever written somebody’s name wrong on purpose because you didn’t like them?

BONUS: If you really want to exercise your social muscle, check out my video on improving your social skills. It’s less than 30 minutes.

Enhance your small talk

Small talk is a CRITICAL part of life and building relationships — it’s what helps people get to know each other, establish meaningful connections, and lay down the foundation for great long-term relationships.

The term “small talk” is actually a complete misnomer because of its HUGE impact on forming relationships and developing unshakeable confidence. As such, it takes a lot more care and nuance than just getting right down to the point.

If you walked right up to a CEO you admired at a mixer or convention and said, “I REALLY LIKE YOU. GIVE ME A JOB, PLEASE!” how do you think she’d react? She probably wouldn’t give you that job.

But if you went in with some care, and drew her into an amazing conversation and THEN asked her for a job (or better yet just advice or a coffee meeting), she’d be a hell of a lot more susceptible to it.

The key is realizing that confidence and the ability to carry a good conversation are skills — and like any other skill they can be learned, honed, and mastered.

I used to feel uncomfortable and out of place during social events too — but over time, I’ve developed hacks for confidence in new situations.

I’ll show you exactly how I do it in these 3 short videos. Just enter your email for instant access.

“Help! My mind goes blank when I talk to people”: How to talk to people is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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How would you help this co-worker?

Years ago, I needed to help a co-worker finish a project that:

1. He was leading
2. Would help my team

“Sure,” I said. “Just find me tomorrow and I’ll show you how to do it.”

Well, tomorrow came and went — and he NEVER found me.

Later, when he was asked about the project, he just sighed and said it didn’t get done. Then he turned to me and asked if I could help him later with the project.

“Dude, you were supposed to find me,” I told him sharply.

“I know,” he said. “I was busy. Sometimes if you want someone to do something, you have to go above and beyond.”

So I exploded.

“Listen, if you need my help, you need to find ME — not the other way around.”

Then he said something I’ll never forget. “Technically, you’re right. But you have to decide if you want to be right or if you want this to get done.”

So that got me thinking…is he right? Should my stake in the project have dictated how I should’ve handled the situation? Or was my friend just being a jackass?

I thought I knew the right answer, but I wanted to put it to my readers first: What would YOU have done in this situation?

The answers I got back were insightful and funny. I want to share a few of them with you today, and tell you what I think I should have done.

Co-worker help advice #1: Hindsight is a bitch

Ha! I love it. Hindsight is 20/20. But you can still learn a thing or two by looking back though — which is why I love Andre’s calendar suggestion. IWT readers know that my days are dictated by what is and what isn’t on my calendar (see my full productivity system post here). Having this task on my calendar after he asked would have saved us both a lot of frustration later on.

Co-worker help advice #2: Take the initiative

When my co-worker first told me that I had to go “above and beyond” to help him out, I was pissed. While it was infuriating, I think Ed is right in saying I should have taken the initiative and brought up the meeting. After all, my team was benefitting from this project as much as my co-worker was.

Bottom line: Sometimes to learn how to be a better co-worker you have to pick up some of the slack yourself.

Co-worker help advice #3: Set up boundaries

I LOVE IT. There’s no limit to how much money you can earn BUT there is a finite amount of time you have to spend. As such, your time is incredibly valuable. Why would you want to waste it on someone who forgets their appointments with you? Clearly, they don’t value your time or understand that it’s important.

Co-worker help advice #4: He’s being a dick…but that’s not the point

I agree. It’s my duty as a leader for my team to go out and make sure that the guy got his project finished. Even if he’s in the wrong (and he is) I should have taken more initiative in seeing the project through. That way I could help in supporting my colleagues in the workplace.

Co-worker help advice #5: Tell him to fuck off

Simple. Honest. To-the-point. I LOVE IT.

Though I’m sure there’s a more nuanced response out there….

What I should have done to help my co-worker

Like many readers said, hindsight can be incredibly enlightening. That’s why I would have taken measures to ensure a situation like this NEVER happened in the first place through habit building systems.

My favorite one? Using my calendar.

I practically dictate my day-to-day goals by one mantra: If it’s not on my calendar, it doesn’t exist. 

Look at this one item:

This is a random to-do that I would normally put in the back of my head… and it would never get done. Instead, I added it to my calendar so it always gets done.

It might seem anal retentive. It might seem absolutely crazy. But it WORKS.

Instead of letting my friend “come find me,” I would have scheduled time in my day to work with him. That way, when the notification came up on my calendar, I knew to go remind him that I was going to help him go through the project.

Don’t get me wrong: It was still incredibly frustrating to hear my friend say that I should have reached out to him, but in the end, my team benefitted from it and my company would have as well. Sometimes, your worst enemy is your ego. You have to leave it at the door if you want to be able to effectively accomplish your goals.

Advanced tip: You can set up weekly, monthly, and quarterly “to-dos” for things like reviewing your systems, planning an annual negotiation, or even checking in on your relationship.

Also be sure to check out my 15-minute video below where I break down the 5 most common productivity mistakes. It’ll help you be able to utilize the time you set aside to accomplish your goals effectively.

Build habits that last

If you’re like my co-worker, you also struggle to build solid habits and accomplish even the simplest of goals — which is why I put together the very best material on setting goals, creating habits that stick, and getting back on track if you ever fall off.

If you’re ready to stop making excuses, break out of that rut, and make a major change in your life, this free guide is for you.

>

Take a look at what’s inside:

• How to wake up productive and get more done by noon than most people do all day (covered in Part 2)
• “If I wasn’t so lazy, I’d ____.” I’ll teach you how to keep accomplishing goals even when you “don’t feel like it” (covered in Part 3)
• Ever spent a busy day filled with distractions — answering emails and putting out fires — and walked away feeling like you finished nothing? I’ll show you how to stay laser-focused on tasks and eliminate distractions (covered in Part 6)

This guide includes HD videos, downloadable worksheets, lessons from the world’s leading experts on behavioral change, and much, much more.

So check it out. Try out the techniques. And enjoy the results you get for the rest of your life.

How would you help this co-worker? is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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The Secret Life of the Payday Loan Borrower

Payday loans are the dirty little debt secret no one talks about, but as many as 2 million Canadians borrow these from these high-interest short-term loans every year. What is a payday loan? A payday loan is a loan for an amount less than $1,500 with a term ranging from 14 to 90 days. They typically have interest rates north of 300%, making them some of the most toxic financial products available to consumers. Payday lenders have been criticized and labeled as predatory since they typically target the economically vulnerable and trap them in a cycle of debt. These loans are marketed as “alternative financing” for people who do not have or cannot get more traditional forms of credit, like a credit card or line of credit. Payday lenders typically set up shop in low-income neighborhoods, where they prey on new immigrants or the working poor who are both low […]

The post The Secret Life of the Payday Loan Borrower appeared first on Money After Graduation.

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4 best ways to invest in your 20s

Productivity advice for the weird

I get some version of this email every day:

“How many hours do you work, Ramit? What tool do you use to manage your social media? Do you actually read 2,000 emails/day?”

All right, you want to know how I actually stay productive? Fine, I’ll show you exactly what I do. No pandering, no hiding the truth. You might think I’m over-the-top, or that my approach is weird or won’t work for you…but I don’t care if people think it’s “too much.” I care about making an impact.

Introducing the 3 Tiers of Productivity

Listen to the way most people talk about productivity.

• “I just need to buckle down.”
• “I need to find my ‘Why’… THEN everything will fall into place.”
• “I guess I’m just not motivated enough.”

Look, productivity isn’t about “motivation.” If you think it is, you’ve already lost.

Productivity is about understanding what you really want to do, then building systems to make it work for you. The goal isn’t Inbox Zero. (Who gives a shit?) Your goal is to enable yourself to perform at your very best, every day, and over the course of weeks and months and years.

This is how you make a huge impact. Sure, you might slip up a few times. Some days you just won’t feel it — and that’s fine. Real productivity gives you freedom and flexibility because you’re consistent 95% of the time.

Think of productivity like a pyramid.

At the bottom — the foundation — are your fundamentals. Things like your environment, your sleep, and knowing what you’re going to work on every morning. Everybody ignores these because they’re not sexy. But if you don’t get these right, nothing else matters.

In the middle is your psychology, like the ability to set boundaries, handle setbacks, and be positive and resilient.

At the very top — the least important part — are the details. The things like “Which app do you use?” Everybody wastes their time focusing on this stuff. (Get a life.)

But I know you productivity nutjobs want to know all my favorite little life hacks, so I’ll show you what I use and exactly how I use it. Let’s start at the base of the pyramid, the foundation.

Tier 1: Fundamentals

In our culture, it’s a virtue to make your success seem effortless. But in reality, real success takes real effort. Most will lie to you about how easy it comes. I won’t.

This is precisely why the most important part of the productivity pyramid is the fundamentals: sleep, a clean environment, and knowing exactly what you’re going to do.

These aren’t “easy.” You can’t download an app on your phone to solve them. But they are the secret to permanently increasing your productivity.

Fundamental #1: 8 hours of sleep. Every. Night.

As a culture, we see sleep as a weakness — something that can be powered through and caffeinated over. The data shows this is not true. In fact, a lack of sleep is as harmful as being drunk.

And the celebrities who tell you they “hardly” sleep? Lies. (Just like they lie about rarely working out, when in reality they have nutritionists, trainers, and chefs.)

My fundamental “80% Win” here is that I sleep 7.5 to 8 hours almost every night.

It’s not sexy. But as I’m writing this at 9:34am, I slept 8 hours last night and I woke up knowing I was going to have a productive day.

Here’s what you might not know about sleeping 8 hours/night:

• The truth about sleep makes us feel guilty. People hate hearing the reality of what celebrities eat, because the truth is not sexy. It’s the same for sleep. Because if he can sleep 8 hours and still get a ton done, what does that say about me?
• Sleep-tracking devices are a complete waste of money. Your sleep will not be improved with an app. It will be improved with you doing the hard work of digging into the psychological stories you tell yourself about sleep, then setting up a system to drive the behavior of sleeping on time, then honoring it. Apps and devices are irrelevant.
• Lack of sleep makes you physically weak. On days where I’ve slept less, the most immediate and quantifiable measure is during my workouts. My stamina is down and my lifts are horrible. Nothing as stark as seeing a ~25% reduction in your dumbbell weights to realize sleep has a huge impact.

Interestingly, the hardest part is often our emotional resistance to reminding ourselves to go to sleep. We find it “weird” to set a time to go to sleep (yet we don’t find it weird to set an alarm to wake up). Get over it.

My phone reminds me every night when it’s time to sleep

Fundamental #2: I hire someone to clean my apartment

I’m inspired by beauty. I love clean lines and thoughtful decoration. And I keep my apartment so clean that if I went blind, I would know exactly where the wooden spoon, my tongue cleaner, and my Windex are.

My mantra: A place for everything, and everything in its place!

To help, I hire someone to clean my apartment. I found them through a friend and went through the typical questions to myself:

“Can’t I just do this myself? Will people think I’m a show off? My mom didn’t have someone to clean our house and she had 4 kids…”

But then I remembered that being productive is about enabling yourself to perform at your very best, every day, and over the course of weeks and months and years. I could afford it, and it helped me be productive — so I decided it was the right thing to do.

To go even further, my real sign of abundance was moving this cleaning from once a month…to once a week.

Now I know that every Monday morning, I’ll start the day off with a perfectly clean apartment so I can get to work productively.

Fundamental #3: I have a consistent meal plan, and stick to it

I hired a chef to prepare food for me based on my fitness goals. So now, every single day I know exactly what my meal plan is. It’s one decision every week and not 21 decisions across the week. More on how I set this food system up.

(And when I go out to eat, I order anything I want, guilt-free, knowing that I eat on-plan 95% of the time.)

By the way, if you can’t afford to hire a chef (which is maybe my largest extravagance), the second-best option is to meal-prep on Sundays, packing each meal into its own container. Suddenly, you don’t have to think about food, and you can be thoughtful about your nutrition.

Fundamental #4: I optimize my calendar  

Show me a man’s calendar and his spending, and I’ll show you what he prioritizes.

I love the stability of knowing exactly what I’m going to do every day. For example, every Monday is the same: An all-team call, a product strategy call, etc. Every Tuesday is the same. Same for Wednesday, my no-meeting strategy day and the day I catch up on reading all of my articles tagged “strategy” in Pinboard and allow myself to actually feel things. (A 14-year-old is cognizant of her feelings every single day, but I only have feelings on Wednesday.)

My Mondays always follow the same structure

I also set up my calendar to take advantage of my creative energy. I have my best ideas in the morning. As the day goes on, I shift from individual writing to team calls.

Writing in the morning, meetings in the afternoon

The theme? I reduce variables so I can be totally present and focused. I’m not wondering, “What am I doing today??” because my weeks always look the same. I don’t wonder, “What am I going to eat tonight?” because my meals are pre-cooked. Psychological switching costs are real and I’d rather save my energy for other things.

All of these are totally un-sexy and most people will skip right over them (I know I did when I was younger). “Yeah, yeah, sleep is important,” I would say. “But what apps do you use???” I was an idiot.

Get these big wins right, and the productivity apps you use are irrelevant.

QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF:

□ On average, do you sleep 7-8 hours/night?

□ Do you wake up knowing exactly what you’re going to do every day?

□ Is your workspace clean and organized?

□ Is your calendar arranged to match your energy throughout the day?

□ Do you know exactly what you’re going to eat tomorrow (and does it give you energy)?

Tier 2: Psychology

Why do we feel guilty about time management? Why do we use words like “information detox” when it comes to our work? And why are we so embarrassed about the things we actually need in order to be productive?

For example, when I host a webcast late at night, I always end up going to sleep at 1 or 2am, much later than usual (thanks to caffeine and adrenaline). I used to have my normal meetings scheduled for 9am the next day, and I would be totally out of it all day. One day, it occurred to me that maybe I should push back my 9am meeting by an hour on the rare days when I hold a webinar the night before.

You know the next thing I felt? EMBARRASSMENT.

I “shouldn’t” need to push back the morning meeting. I’m a machine, right? Doesn’t everyone just talk about “powering through it”? Also, isn’t it self-indulgent to give myself an hour extra in the morning?

The answer, of course, is that I was working until 10:30pm the night before…and this only happens once a month. It’s perfectly fine to give myself a little time to catch up.

This is why I spend so much time on the emotional and psychological side of productivity. If I didn’t tackle these deep issues — the feelings of guilt, embarrassment, and “should-itis” — we would just jump right into the third section: tactics.

No productivity app or 7-second solution is ever going to tackle the psychological and emotional barriers we feel. Only you can do that. And it’s hard.

Mind hack #1: Set clear boundaries

100% of the time I hear someone saying they’re “overwhelmed,” when I dig in, I discover someone with an inability to set boundaries.

 

The biggest skill in combatting overwhelm is learning to set boundaries

Some questions to consider:

• When was the last time you said “no” when someone asked you to help them?
• When was the last time you decided what you want to do on a weekend instead of letting someone else decide for you?
• When was the last time you turned down money or an opportunity because it didn’t fit in with your larger goals?

Mind hack #2: Be unapologetic with what you need

Are you comfortable doing things that seem extremely weird to others in order to be productive?

Now here’s what happens when I click on my meeting:

Let’s drill down even further: See that URL?

See how the URL is on its own line?

It used to look like this:

The URLs used to get mixed into the description

But that meant when I clicked it, I’d have to select it, copy/paste, then open another browser window. Do that 10 times a day, 60+ times a week, and it’s one minor irritation that slows you down.

So I set a rule that when a URL is added to my calendar, it has to be added with a hard return. Now, I can double click, Command-C, Command-T to open a new browser tab, Command-V, and I’m instantly in my document in less than 1 second.

Does this seem weird? OCD? Too picky? Would you be embarrassed to tell someone this is what you want?

Maybe it is. But it’s what I need to be productive. My calendar is FILLED with invites so this minor annoyance snowballs into a huge one quickly. You shouldn’t copy my calendar invite system. But you should be as honest with what causes the little frictions in your day.

Imagine the other ways you could implement this principle of a “pixel-perfect” day:

• You always put your cellphone in the same pocket or area of your purse so you’re never fumbling around for it.
• You always tuck your shoelaces into your shoes so they’re organized and you can avoid wrangling them when you pick your shoes up.
• You set a rule to automatically re-order toilet paper when you get below 2 rolls (or spinach or toothpaste or…).

Mind hack #3: Be positive and resilient

Even though life often seems empty and meaningless, and most of what we do will have absolutely zero impact on anything on this planet, I consider myself an optimist. At least that’s what I tell myself.

The most successful people I know are optimistic. That doesn’t mean they’re bubbly or effusive — some of them seem like they’re one step away from a mental institution.

They’re optimistic in themselves. They have the confidence to know that if something goes wrong, they can bounce back.

They have the confidence to know if they sign up to do something they’ve never tried before, they can figure it out.

And they have the confidence to know that the little habits they’ve built over years and years are more important than one binge, one late night, or one day of blowing it off and going to the movies.

(If you want to go deeper, open our Ultimate Guide to Habits in a new tab and save for later.)

A lot of people look at all these systems and calendars and borderline-nutjob processes I’ve built and wonder how tightly wound I must me. Hey, maybe they’re right.

But in reality, most of these habits don’t take much time at all, because I built them years and years ago. They allow me to be totally present and focused on whatever I’m doing. Counterintuitively, discipline gives me freedom.

Just like a great investor knows any individual stock is not going to make or break his portfolio, I know that one day — even a day where I wake up late, eat an insane amount of food, nap half the day, and watch 15 shows on Netflix — is not going to hurt much. That actually sounds pretty fun.

Because I have the confidence in myself and my systems to know that I’ll bounce back tomorrow and get back into it.

How to handle setbacks with a resilient mindset….

• When something goes wrong — you wake up late, miss a deadline, skip the gym, or overeat — do you beat yourself up? Or do you take it in stride, knowing you have the systems and support to get back on track tomorrow?
• Do you have a system you use if you fall behind? (For example, I build in “catch up time” on Wednesdays for anything I’ve fallen behind on.)
• In his book How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big, Scott Adams tells the story of getting a rare disorder that threatened to permanently take away his ability to speak. While in the hospital, he could’ve gotten depressed. But he knew how to keep himself optimistic. He repeated to himself over and over, “I, Scott Adams, will speak perfectly.” Do YOU give yourself this kind of positive reinforcement?  

Tier 3: Details

This is where people spend 90% of their time, when in reality, if you’ve tackled the first 2 pillars, you should spend less than 10% here. It’s like writing a college paper: If you master the material and create a detailed outline, the type of pencil you use really doesn’t matter.

 

Inbox Zero — who gives a shit?

Tactical rules of thumb I use:

• If you can fix something with money, fix it with money. The $100 solution is more powerful than you can imagine, especially when it comes to hiring someone to do something that’s been nagging at you or that you dislike doing. Things like hiring someone to come in and fix some basic thing, pack your clothes, sit down with you and set up email filters, styling, cleaning your closet.
• Automate your repetitive tasks. I have things auto-delivered as much as possible. For example, every week, I get coffee automatically ground and sent to me. Same with toiletries, food, etc. It just shows up and I never worry if I’m going to run out of anything.
• Use systems to help you be proactive about things you want to do. For example, I know the birthdays of all my family members. Instead of just getting reminded about it the day of, I make sure to get reminded 2 weeks before so I can think about gifts and send something to arrive on their birthday.

Apps I use:

You don’t need 10 million apps but I’ll give you a couple to stop the 10,000 emails I get about this.

• TripIt — Puts all of your travel information in a single place. This app automatically updates flight status and displays my confirmation number right when I open it.
• Pinboard & Pocket — Whenever I see something I want to read I bank it for later so I can focus on my current day. Especially on Wednesdays when I read all my items tagged “Strategy.”
• Sanebox — Used for follow-ups to check on people I want to make fun of:

Being disciplined and vindictive is a dangerous combo

• Reminders — For every event on my calendar (Google) I have reminders ping me 5 minutes before on text and my calendar, and my assistant messages me in Slack. That’s 3 points of failure, and sometimes, I need all 3 to save me from letting a meeting slip.

• Google spreadsheet to keep track of contacts — Every year I sit down and ask myself, “Who am I meeting and what’s the quality of those relationships?” I keep a list of every single person I meet all year. If I’ve met 5 people, that’s not good — for me. And with this I can remember to send follow-ups, interesting articles, invitations, etc. I fight to make time for these new relationships. 

To recap, this is totally different than the typical “You need this app” approach. Yes, it’s much more challenging at first because you’re forced to interrogate your own psychology. You face your emotional resistance head on, and you take control of your environment.

But once you do this, it becomes much easier. Because you no longer have to rely on willpower or motivation. I set up my systems once, and then I’m finished. Compare this to people who spend YEARS wondering why they aren’t living the life they want.

Productivity advice for the weird is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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Never Pay More Than 5% Interest on Your Credit Card Debt

When it comes to paying off debt, focusing on ridding yourself of the highest interest balance first. This is often called the Debt Avalanche Method and will save you the most money in the long run. Most credit cards have interest rates of 20%, so carrying even a small balance can be extremely expensive. The crusade against consumer debt is always at the forefront of personal finance advice, because of these high-interest rates. But what if you could lower your interest rate to something that doesn’t make you feel like your face is on fire every time you open your credit card bill? You have no reason to be paying double-digit interest rates on your debt The truth is, you don’t have to (and shouldn’t) be carrying a balance at 20%. Heck, if you have good credit, even 10% is too high. Why? Because if you have a high credit score, […]

The post Never Pay More Than 5% Interest on Your Credit Card Debt appeared first on Money After Graduation.

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How to make money online freelancing — 3 super simple steps

Little known fact: along with being a personal finance expert, I am also a highly skilled mentalist. I’ll prove it. I can read your mind right now and tell you EVERYTHING about you. No, seriously. Get ready to get your mind BLOWN.

I want you to concentrate very carefully on the screen. Concentrating yet? Good. Now give me a moment to work my magic.

Alright. I got it. From my mystical dive into your very psyche, I’ve gathered that you:

• Work a 9 to 5 job
• Want to know how to make extra money online
• Would love the flexibility of working from home

Alright, maybe that trick wasn’t that cool BUT I bet this applies to a lot of you reading this. You don’t have to be a mind reader to know that the majority of people want to escape their office jobs, have more flexibility, and earn more cash. The problem is, though, not a lot of people know HOW to do it.

The good news: With the magic of the internet, you can easily start earning money online this month through freelancing.

The bad news: Freelancing online is only for people who are willing to work hard and put in the time, NOT for those who just want to find a “magic bullet” to make money instead.

If you’re looking to get-rich-quick, I suggest you find another article. For everyone else, if you want to make money through freelancing, there are just a few things you need to know.

Why make money online freelancing?

Even if you have a job you enjoy, there’s really NO reason you shouldn’t be making money on top of that.

There are 4 good reasons why you should definitely freelance to make money.

Reason #1: Most people don’t even think to freelance on the side — giving you an edge

Because of differences in skill, motivation, and luck, few people ever try to start freelancing on the side. Instead, they choose to complain about their financial situations and blame things they can’t control like the economy and taxes while focusing on things like cutting out lattes to save money.

So if you’re in that small group of motivated freelancers who DO actually earn more, you earn the lion’s share of side revenue. When you pick an area to excel in where there’s a built-in barrier to success — like earning more money on the side — the winners get disproportionate rewards.

Reason #2: You can scale your rates and offers to earn as much as you want

When it comes to freelancing or just making money for yourself in general, the sky’s the limit in terms of earnings.

Hell, I’m a good example of that. I started my blog in 2004 while I was a student at Stanford. Back then, it was just an ugly blog that no one read.

My old blog.

It wasn’t until 2007 that I created my first ever online product: a $4.95 e-book that I was afraid to sell because I didn’t want to seem “sales-y.” It was the first time I charged readers for my material. They responded by calling me a “sellout” and saying I “jumped the shark.”

Fast forward to today. IWT transformed itself into a multimillion dollar business. We’ve launched over 18 successful products including courses on career development, psychology, fitness, cooking, and freelancing. And we’ve built a business with over 30,000 paying customers.

“We get it, Ramit. You got lucky and were able to make millions from your blog. Stop bragging.”

My point is this: Whether you’re freelancing or starting a business, you can scale your prices and offerings to the point where you’re earning as much money as you want. Each price point can act as a stepping stone to the next one as you learn more about your customers. The only question is whether or not you’re willing to get started.

Reason #3: You’ll hedge your risks

What if you lost your job tomorrow? Would you have another source of income to fall back on? If not, you’re going to have to dip into your emergency fund…if you have one that is.

From reading this site, you know about the importance of diversifying your investments. It’s the same idea when it comes to your revenue sources. That’s why it’s so important that you make sure that you have an extra source of income — and freelancing is perfect for that.

And if you start while you do have another job, you’ll be able to build and establish worthwhile connections and clients for later.

Reason #4: Managing your money and earning more money is a powerful combination

Combine earning more with the automation strategy for saving, investing, and spending that I outline in my book and you’ll have a powerful financial combination guaranteed to set you up for a Rich Life.

Remember: There’s a limit to how much you can save but no limit to how much you can earn. 

FIRST, do this…

Now the question is HOW you can freelance on the side.

To figure that out, you need to first answer two very important questions:

1. What am I offering?
2. Why would anyone want to buy from me?

That’s it. Once you have those two questions fully answered, you’re well on your way to a successful freelance career.

What am I offering?

I truly believe that every single person out there has a marketable skill in them — many just don’t realize it. As a result, it becomes the most common barrier preventing people from freelancing or starting their own business.

When it comes to deciding what you want to do, though, you just need to ask yourself four questions:

1. What do you already pay for?
   
   

   We already pay people to do a lot of different things. Can you turn one of those things into a freelance business?

   Examples: Clean your home, walk your pet, cook your meals, etc.

2. What skills do you have?
   
   

   Now, what do you know — and know well? These are the skills you have that you’re great at — and people want to pay you to teach them.

   Examples: Fluency in a foreign language, programming, SEO, cooking skills, etc.

3. What do your friends say you’re great at?
   
   

   I love this question. Not only can it be a nice little ego boost — but it can also be incredibly revealing.

   Examples: Workout routines, relationship advice, great fashion sense, etc.

4. What do you do on a Saturday morning?
   
   

   What do you do on a Saturday morning before everyone else is awake? This can be incredibly revealing to what you’re passionate about and what you like to spend your time on.

   Examples: Browsing fashion websites, working on your car, reading fitness subreddits, etc.

Find an answer to those questions and I promise you you’ll find a way to make money freelancing.

Why would anyone want to buy from me?

I know what some of you are thinking: How on earth do I find someone who wants to pay me to do XYZ???

Listen, I get it. You might think that your skills speaking fluent Portuguese or your ability to do awesome magic tricks will never earn you money.. .but that’s simply not the case.

Check out these three totally real freelancers and businesses that earn money despite seeming “unmarketable.”

• Bird Tricks: Have a parrot? Want to train your parrots to talk and do tricks? There are people out there who will teach you how (as well as many who want to LEARN how).
• Grammar Girl: This site offers you “quick and dirty” grammar tips each day to help you improve your writing and communication skills.
• Tennis Elbow Secrets Revealed: That’s right. It’s entirely dedicated to one problem persistent in many people’s lives: Tennis Elbow.

Though these businesses are unconventional, they prove one salient point about freelancing: People will be willing to pay you for ANYTHING, as long as you’re adding value to their lives.

You might not think your magic skills are profitable until you realize that birthday parties, schools, and even businesses are willing to pay you to perform — some might even pay you to teach them. Simply put, the sky’s the limit when it comes to freelancing.

“But Ramit, I’m a writer/designer/developer. And there are TONS of us out there. How am I supposed to sell my talents?”

Look, It doesn’t matter if there are other copywriters or designers or whatever else out there. As long as you show your client that you’re able to offer real value and benefits, they’re going to hire you. Period.

Which brings us to…

The 3 steps to freelancing online

Once you answer those two questions you’re going to be ready to follow the exact steps to making money online through freelancing. They are:

1. Find your first client
2. Make your offer
3. Know what to charge

Step 1: Find your first client

To find your first client you need to know where they live.

No, I don’t mean stalk them, you creep. I mean knowing who they are and what problems they have. Ask yourself:

• Who is my client?
• Where do they go when they want to look for a solution to their problems?
• Where are they ALREADY looking for solutions to their problems?
• How can you connect them to your service?

In classic marketing terms, you’re going to want to define your target market. It’s an essential first step that, unfortunately, A LOT of people gloss over when they start making money freelancing online. If you don’t do this, you’re going to be at a loss at what exactly you’re selling and to whom you’re selling it.

So do me a favor and niche down your market.

Who EXACTLY is the type of person who might want to buy your product? Ask yourself even more specific questions now about your potential client.

• How old are they?
• Where do they live?
• What are their interests?
• How much do they make?
• What books do they read?

You’re going to want to get into your clients’ heads in order to figure out exactly what they need so that you can provide it for them.

Then, find out where they go to find solutions. Get in their heads:

• Want to pitch to moms that blog about children? Go to The Mom Blogs and start with the ones under “Popular Blogs.”
• Looking for physical or massage therapists within 50 miles of your house? Yelp should get you started easily.
• If you want to do… large dog grooming and sitting, well there’s probably a local pet store or dog park near you where owners are all congregating just waiting for you to offer them a solution.

Here are a few suggestion of some other great sites freelancers can use to find business online:

• Writers: MediaBistro.com, Upwork.com, FreelanceWritingGigs.com 
• Illustrators/Designers: 99designs.com, Designs.net
• Programmers: Toptal.com, SmashingMagazine.com

So many people email me saying things like, “But Ramit! I have this idea and have NO IDEA where to find customers!” My response is always calm, yet you know that anger boils closely below. “What have you done to research your audience? Have you emailed a few people? Taken them out to lunch? Asked complementary service providers if this is a good idea?”

The answer is almost always no.

Example that made me angry: Last night, someone said they were going to start a wedding-montage photo business. What should they do? They appeared to be stuck. Answer: Go talk to a few wedding photographers and ask them if this is a good idea. Would their customers buy it? Are there holes in the market that are not being served? What about event planners? Florists? You could do this in 1-2 weeks and save 1 year of your life.

80% of your ideas will be strengthened — or washed out — with this simple exercise. And it only takes a week or two to get started.

Get in these people’s heads & then niche it down. Read their minds and then act on those insights. So you’ve figured out where the secret large dog pet store is. Great. Now look at their website, visit the store, talk to the owner. GET OFF YOUR ASS AND TAKE ACTION.

Could you pitch one potential client each morning? You probably could if you created an email template (more on that in a bit). How about 10 over the weekend, playing with different headlines/offers so you can see which ones work better?

It doesn’t have to take a long time, and it doesn’t have to be agonizing.

Bonus: If you want to get the exact word-for-word email scripts my students used to generate millions from leads, get them here now.

Step 2: Make your offer

After you niche down your offering and find a few good leads, you’ll need to craft a pitch that is tailored to them.

In doing so, you’ll want to stress the BENEFITS of working with you — while not giving away too much information as to how you’ll help. I lost my fair share of clients while I was starting out by giving away exactly how I’d help them in my initial reach out. Stupid.

Since I’m such a benevolent and generous person, I’m going to let you in on the exact 5-line email template I’ve used to craft the perfect pitch to potential clients. It includes:

1. The introduction. You’re going to want to build rapport by introducing yourself and how you know about the client.
2. The offer. Talk about them. What do you want to do for them? Why are you good for that role? You’re going to want to do some research on the organization to see what they need help with.
3. The benefit. Walk them through how your work will benefit their company. Are you going to free up more time for them? Are you going to maximize profits by X amount?
4. The foot-in-the-door. This is a classic technique that utilizes an old psychology trick to get the client to agree to a small agreement so you can ask for a larger agreement later.
5. The call to action. Be clear with this and ask them if they would like to proceed. The call to action is a critical part of this script.

When it’s all put together, it’ll look something like this:

CLIENT’S NAME,

[Introduction] I read your article about X and noticed that you’ve recently started using videos on your website.

[The offer] I’ve been doing video editing for three years and I’d like to offer to help you edit your videos and get them optimized for the web.

[The benefit] That would make them look more professional and load faster, which is important for your readers. And you’d free up time that you could use to create new content.

[The foot-in-the-door] We can discuss the details, of course, but first I wanted to see if this is something you might be interested in.

[The call to action] If so, would it be okay if I sent you a few ideas on how to help?

Best,

Ramit Sethi

And that’s it. What I love the most about this email is the fact that there’s zero fat on it. Each word here has earned its place and carries a weight with it. That’s what you want out of a good email.

If you don’t hear back from them after a week, you should send a follow-up email. After all, life happens. Your email might have gotten lost or they might have seen it, meant to reply, and simply forgotten about it. If that happens, here’s a good template for a follow-up email.

CLIENT’S NAME,

I just wanted to follow up with the email I sent you last week regarding my offer.

If you have any questions or concerns, I’d be happy to address them.

Best,

Ramit Sethi

Once again, the message is simple — but it allows you to go back to the top of their inbox, and therefore, to the front of their minds.

Step 3: Know what to charge

This is where the HUGE majority of people get tripped up when freelancing for the first time…and I don’t blame you if you do too. There’s no exact science on what to charge and so much of it is guesswork until you land on the right price for you.

What you should focus on, though, is your pricing model — of which, there are a few to choose from:

• Hourly. Most of us have had a job like this before. You charge an hourly rate and your client pays you per hour. The benefit for the client is that they mitigate their risk since they can just stop paying you whenever they want if they’re dissatisfied. This benefits you because there are many industry standards on what normal hourly rates for your job are.
• By project. For this, you’ll be paid per project. So say, if a client wants you to illustrate their e-book, you’ll know exactly what you’re getting paid for for the entire project with more concrete deliverables for them.
• By retainer. This allows the client to have access to you at any given time during a month. Usually, you’ll be paid on retainer if you’re incredibly integral to the company.  
• Commission/Bonus. This payment model can work in conjunction with all of the other ones and can provide a healthy incentive for you to get your work done. For instance, if your client promises you a $1,000 bonus for attaining X amount of leads with your landing pages.  
• Value-based. As the name suggests, this payment model is based on the amount of value you’re giving the company. For example, if you promise to write a sales page you know will generate $200,000 in revenue for the client, you can negotiate for them to pay you $15,000 for it.

Though all of the above pricing models are perfectly fine to use when freelancing, I highly suggest you get paid by the hour when starting out. After all, you’re a beginner freelancer. Clients are going to be wary of you and won’t be inclined to pay you a big project fee. If you charge by the hour, they feel safer knowing they can stop paying you whenever they want. It’s just much simpler.

Of course, as you progress in your freelance career and attain more clients, you’ll be able to embrace the whole gamut of pricing models as you see fit. But it’s just simpler to stick with charging by hour at first.

When it comes to exactly how much you should charge at first, there’s no right answer. Luckily, though, there are a few handy back-of-the-napkin tricks you can use to find a rough estimate of what you should be charging. They are:

1. Drop Three Zeros Method
   
   

   Simply take your ideal (read: realistic) salary, drop three zeroes from it, and voila, you have your hourly rate!

   For example, say you’d really like to earn at least $40,000. Just take the three zeroes from the end and you now have your rate: $40/hour.

2. Double your “resentment number”
   
   

   I love this one because it’s both really interesting and effective. Ask yourself: What’s the lowest rate you’ll work for that’ll leave you resentful of your work?

   Say you’ll work for $15/hour at the VERY LEAST. Just double that number so now you’ll earn $30/hour.

3. Do what the next guy does
   
   

   Go to Google and search for the average hourly rate for whatever service you’re providing. You’ll get a good sense of where to start when you’re charging your clients.

The best part is after you start charging your clients, you can start to take on more or less work until you earn the amount you want.

For example, after you earn your first $1,000 it’s incredibly easy to start dialing your prices up and charge even more money from your clients.

This is called the Tuner Strategy. Start “tuning” your rates after your first few clients. Were you making $30/hour? Start charging $40 or even $50. There’s no hard and set rule for how much you should charge. Just start tuning until you find a rate you’re happy with.

Investing in yourself

Remember: it’s okay to make mistakes. Especially when you’re just starting out. The important thing is that you get started and learn from those mistakes.

Now, one thing that you will find very common with people who have not taken the time to invest in learning how this stuff works, is they will create what’s called levels of abstraction.

Rather than just going directly to what they want, they will create all these different levels of abstraction — like making a Facebook page or a blog — that make them feel good, but that actually don’t require them to do the hard work.

Once you’ve found a place to get clients and have an email that gets responses, keep iterating on it until you are constantly getting new clients. This is what separates winning freelancers from losers. Losers wait for the perfect client to fall from the sky. Winners start somewhere, then improve their pitch bit by bit.

How to make money online freelancing — 3 super simple steps is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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A Retraction

It’s not often that I retract an article. In the eleven-plus years that I’ve been blogging about money, I think maybe it’s happened twice before. Today marks a third instance.

Yesterday, I published a piece about the difference between a half-ass homeowner and a Money Boss owner. While I stand by the points I made, I acknowledge that my delivery was overly emotional — even petty. I apologize for that. I strive to keep Money Boss (and my other sites) positive places rather than negative ones, but in this case I failed.

I believe my overall point — that a smart homeowner is proactive and does her best to address problems sooner rather than later — is an important one, though. So, I’ll rework that material and re-publish it in a more positive piece later this week.

The post A Retraction appeared first on Money Boss.

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The Half-Ass Homeowner and the Money Boss Homeowner

Kim and I have been in our new house for ten days now. We love it. We love the charming quirkiness of it all — the low ceilings, the funky layout, the small space and lack of storage. We love the yard. We love the neighborhood.

That said, there are definitely some things we don’t love. Chief among those is how poorly the previous owners took care of everything. Their motto seems to have been, “Why do it right when you can do it half-ass?” At every turn, we are amazed at how they cut corners or chose the cheap, quick option when the best option would have cost very little extra time and money.

Let me give you a specific example to demonstrate what I mean.

The Half-Ass Homeowner

In the backyard, the previous owners built raised beds to grow tomatoes. That’s great, right? Built properly, raised beds can be a fantastic way to maximize vegetable garden production in a small space. I’ve built raised beds in the past, and have always enjoyed the sense of order they give to a garden.

That said, the raised beds in our yard have half-ass construction.

• They were built with cheap planks less than half an inch thick. A good quality raised bed ought to use 2×4 or 2×6 lumber — or something similarly robust.
• These beds have no lining, which means the wood will rot quickly from contact with the soil. A quality raised bed ought to be lined with heavy-duty plastic along the inside walls before adding soil.
• Most annoying to me is the fact that the beds aren’t level. Rather than spend an extra few minutes to spade a flat surface, the previous owners simply built the frames to the slope of the yard. So lazy!

This is but one example of the many half-ass repairs and modifications we’ve discovered during our first ten days in this house. We’re constantly uncovering new and crazy cases of laziness and lack of care.

When we moved in, for instance, nearly every knob on every door, drawer, and cabinet was loose. Our guess is that they’ve been loose for years. In ten minutes of walking from room to room with a screwdriver, I tightened everything that could be tightened. I have no clue why the previous owners chose to live with loose hardware for so long.

Or there’s the half-ass shelves in the office closet. Rather than spend a little time and money to do things right, the previous owners apparently used scrap molding as a sort of base/frame for each shelf, then tacked the shelving material to these flimsy supports. Naturally, the shelves couldn’t support much. The tacks had long ago popped loose. The shelves bowed and bounced with even light use. It took half an hour (and $48) for me to tear out the half-ass frames and screw in high-quality brackets to support the three shelves. Now they look better and can hold more than shirts and sweaters.

I could go on but I won’t. You get the idea. The previous owners of this house — who are perfectly pleasant people in daily life — not only seem to have deferred most maintenance on the property during the seventeen years they lived here (which we knew before buying the place), but when they did make improvements they cut corners and did the bare minimum to get by.

This, my friends, is not the Money Boss way.

The Money Boss Homeowner

As a money boss, you manage your personal finances as if you were managing an actual business. If you’re also a homeowner, your house is likely your most valuable asset — and your greatest expense. It makes sense, therefor, to be especially diligent about maintaining and managing your home.

To that end:

• When you notice a problem, whether it’s a minor repair or a major project, make a note of it immediately. I’m not saying that you always need to take care of things right away — although sooner is better — but you absolutely ought to keep a list of work that needs to be done around the house.
• Keep your list of projects in a central location that you access often. At our hundred-year-old farmhouse, Kris and I kept a hand-written log of future work. Today, Kim and I have a Basecamp project devoted to our new place. Whenever something new comes up, it gets added to Basecamp.

• Set aside a regular time to maintain your home. Even one Saturday morning a month is better than nothing. If you’re able to devote more time to upkeep, that’s even better. Plan in advance to tackle specific tasks. Buy any tools or supplies you need before the time you’ve set aside to perform the work.
• Take time to do things right. Don’t rush your projects. Use the interwebs to research how to do quality work. As most of us have learned by now, you can find almost anything on YouTube. If, as sometimes happens to me, you find that you’ve made a mistake, don’t be afraid to go back and redo things the right way. It’s better to spend a few minutes making a correction than it is to continue down the wrong path. That’s the road to half-ass homeownership.
• Choose quality tools and materials. Yes, quality costs more upfront. That’s okay. In the long run, quality will save you time and money.
• Keep a curated list of quality contractors. As you work with folks you like, add their names and numbers to a spreadsheet or contact database. Better yet, pool resources with your friends and family so that you have a shared list that everyone can rely on. My brother, for instance, thought the folks who repaired his siding did terrific work. They’re not cheap, he says, but they’re worth it. I plan to call them when we replace our siding. Meanwhile, my friend Emma (who owns rental properties) recently shared her spreadsheet of trusted vendors. When you don’t want to do work yourself, it’s helpful to have a catalog of reliable workers.
• Create a dedicated home-improvement fund. I’m a fan of targeted savings accounts, and think it’s wise to have one devoted to home maintenance and improvement. The rule of thumb I’ve always heard (and which has worked for me in the past) is that each year you should count on spending about one percent of your home’s value on necessary maintenance. So, because our place cost about $450,000, Kim and I should budget around $4500 per year (or about $400 per month) for ongoing projects — once we’ve taken care of all the deferred maintenance left by the previous owners.

The other night, our friends Bret and Vicki came over. We commisserated about our homes. Fifteen years ago, Bret bought a place like ours, a place with lots of potential but tons of deferred maintenance and a history of half-ass repairs. For fifteen years, he’s been gradually upgrading and erasing the stuff the former owners did.

“I don’t get the mentality,” Bret said. “When the previous owner was installing a shelf or something and ran out of screws, instead of taking the time to go get the right screw, he just looked for some half-ass solution. Like, he might take a nail and use it instead of the correct screw.”

Here’s a general Money Boss principle, not just for homeownership but for all financial matters: A money boss doesn’t do things half-ass. She does them right. She doesn’t mind that it might require more time or more money. She doesn’t mind that it might mess with her current plans. She understands that doing something half-ass today leads to years (or decades) of frustration. Doing it right means she never has to think about it again — because it’s right.

The Bottom Line

It’s important to note that there’s usually not one specific “right” way to get something done. There are generally multiple paths to success. Using the raised beds as an example, there are dozens of options for quality construction.

It’s also important to note that while doing it right is sometimes more expensive than taking the easy way out, that doesn’t mean you need to spend a fortune to obtain quality. It cost me $48 and 30 minutes to upgrade my closet shelves from sloppy to solid. It’d probably cost something similar to upgrade each of the raised garden beds.

It comes down to is this: A money boss is a proactive homeowner. He doesn’t procrastinate until a minor problem becomes a crisis. He doesn’t constantly defer maintenance until his home falls into a state of disrepair. He doesn’t cut corners on upgrades and improvements, but chooses options that will last for years — or decades.

The post The Half-Ass Homeowner and the Money Boss Homeowner appeared first on Money Boss.

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How we’re manipulated to rant about stuff we know nothing about

In grad school, I was the RA (resident assistant) of a 50-person house. We had a house budget that we had to decide how to spend on things like a house party or better food.

HOLY SHIT. I’ve never seen a worse side of humanity than when a small amount of money being pooled has to be used for a group decision. This was when I first learned that whenever a group has to decide how to spend its money, everyone loses their mind.

Whiny kid: “I don’t want to use my $20 for a house party … I don’t drink.”

Staff: “Um, we’ll be serving Coke/Pepsi/non-alcoholic punch too.”

Whiny kid: “Well … uh … I still don’t want a party.”

Imagine this conversation happening about 90 times with increasingly angry college kids. I tried to calmly explain how house dues work — you contribute a little bit of money, and the staff votes on how it will be spent. Seemingly normal people turned into monsters over $20.

My room was on the second floor so, unfortunately, jumping out head first wouldn’t have ended the pain. I just stared, like a Vietnam vet’s thousand-yard stare, for hours upon end. People weren’t even willing to give up a LITTLE bit of money for the greater good.

Years later, I’d learn that these irrational attitudes don’t change when we grow up — the amounts just get bigger. 

Take taxes as an example: “I WOULD be happy to pay my taxes, but not if they spend it on X.”

(This is EXACTLY why I don’t listen to anyone’s stupid complaints about their tax money. In college, I learned how people act when the stakes are low.)

We may not understand how house dues or billions of dollars of national funding are spent. But we sure know how angry it makes us when we see money taken out of our paycheck every month. That anger — count how many times you’ve heard someone ranting about their taxes — is so much easier than actually learning how things work.

Here, I’ll show you. Pop quiz: How much do we spend on foreign aid? (Just ballpark it.) If you ask a random American, the average answer is 31%.

The reality: It’s actually less than 1%. 

Similarly, if you ask people if crime is up, they’ll say yes. (Wrong.)

I’m picking these examples not only because people are wrong (which is fine, nobody can be expected to know everything), but people feel VISCERALLY ANGRY and PERSONALLY AFFECTED by them. Just like that lame college student who wouldn’t have a party under ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

Like taxes — the topic that nobody understands yet everyone “feels” mad about. To show you how little people understand about taxes, look at this:

You are wrong and will be wrong for the next 50 years. But I understand, you “feel” right.  

OMFG.

Let’s examine the psychology of this guy. He genuinely believes that because he got a raise, he now makes less money than before. He is wrong.

(Dear guy, it’s called marginal taxe—ah, forget it. At this point, it’s impossible to have a logical discussion. That’s why approximately 239,283 of you are getting your spindly little fingers ready to write me an angry email. Don’t bother.)

The most insane part is, he will probably believe this for next 40 years of his life. Imagine him at a party when someone brings up taxes. You and I can totally see this guy launching into a rant about how it’s not fair, how he’d happily pay his taxes if there wasn’t so much “waste,” and how there’s no incentive to work.

He’s wrong, plain and simple.

So what’s going on here?

It’s easier to get angry than to get educated. I guarantee this guy has never read a single book on personal finance. And, to put it charitably, no CEO has ever decided not to grow his business because of taxes.

As the famed philosopher Gotye said, “You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness.”

Preach, Gotye. Preach.

But for a lot of us, it’s not sadness. It’s anger. ‘I’m ANGRY that I have to pay for dates.’ ‘I’m ANGRY that I have to pay so much in taxes.’ ‘I’m ANGRY that baby boomers are stealing our future.’

Look, I’m not the guy who tells you not to get mad. I’ve made it a life skill to get mad at thousands of things. In college, I created an entire blog called THINGS I HATE!!

But I also know there’s only a certain amount of rage we can all hold. Is ranting about national tax policy really going to change anything? No, of course not.

You’d be better served to focus on being mad at Kate for stealing your lunch from the fridge every Monday at work. Why don’t you do something about her?

Or why not take a look in the mirror and get mad about not following through on the things you said you would?

I got mad about the personal finance industry lying to everyone and decided to do something about it. In 2004, I started a blog that nobody read and I just kept at it, week after week, until it finally started to break through. But it took me 13 years to get from there to here.

Think about the chain of changes this guy would have to go through to change his view:

• “Hey, I’ve noticed I get mad about taxes A LOT.”
• “Hey, I’ve realized I don’t actually know much about taxes.”
• “Hey, I’m going to do some research, find the best 2-3 books on taxes, read them, and develop an educated opinion.”
• “Hey, I might have been wrong.”
• “Hey, I’m going to stop ranting about taxes and talk about something else.”

Let’s just say … this is unlikely. You’d be more likely find me dressed in leather chaps dancing around a fire with a bunch of unemployed life coaches than see this guy doing even one of those things.

Don’t just laugh. It’s exactly the same for you. Maybe not with taxes, but you have an opinion that’s become part of your identity, that you’re viscerally angry about — and that you don’t really know anything about.

Will you recognize it?

Will you change it?

Will you make the decision to focus on the things you can control, pick them carefully, and do something about it?

Most won’t.

And only a few will.

How we’re manipulated to rant about stuff we know nothing about is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

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